Costello Buys a Computer from Abbott

ABBOTT:   Super Duper computer store. Can I help you?
COSTELLO:   Thanks. I'm setting up an office in my den and I'm thinking about buying a computer.
ABBOTT:   Mac?
COSTELLO:   No, the name's Lou.
ABBOTT:   Your computer?
COSTELLO:   I don't own a computer. I want to buy one.
ABBOTT:   Mac?
COSTELLO:   I told you, my name's Lou.
ABBOTT:   What about Windows?
COSTELLO:   Why? Will it get stuffy in here?
ABBOTT:   Do you want a computer with Windows?
COSTELLO:   I don't know. What will I see when I look at the windows?
ABBOTT:   Wallpaper.
COSTELLO:   Never mind the windows. I need a computer and software.
ABBOTT:   Software for Windows?
COSTELLO:   No. On the computer! I need something I can use to write proposals, track expenses and run my business. What do you have?
ABBOTT:   Office.
COSTELLO:   Yeah, for my office. Can you recommend anything?
ABBOTT:   I just did.
COSTELLO:   You just did what?
ABBOTT:   Recommend something.
COSTELLO:   You recommended something?
ABBOTT:   Yes.
COSTELLO:   For my office?
ABBOTT:   Yes.
COSTELLO:   OK, what did you recommend for my office?
ABBOTT:   Office.
COSTELLO:   Yes, for my office!
ABBOTT:   I recommend Office with Windows.
COSTELLO:   I already have an office with windows! OK, let's just say I'm sitting at my computer and I want to type a proposal. What do I need?
ABBOTT:   Word.
COSTELLO:   What word?
ABBOTT:   Word in Office.
COSTELLO:   The only word in office is office.
ABBOTT:   The Word in Office for Windows.
COSTELLO:   Which word in office for windows?
ABBOTT:   The Word you get when you click the blue "W".
COSTELLO:   I'm going to click your blue "w" if you don't start with some straight answers. What about financial bookkeeping? You have anything I can track my money with?
ABBOTT:   Money.
COSTELLO:   That's right. What do you have?
ABBOTT:   Money.
COSTELLO:   I need money to track my money?
ABBOTT:   It comes bundled with your computer.
COSTELLO:   What's bundled with my computer?
ABBOTT:   Money.
COSTELLO:   Money comes with my computer?
ABBOTT:   Yes. No extra charge.
COSTELLO:   I get a bundle of money with my computer? How much?
ABBOTT:   One copy.
COSTELLO:   Isn't it illegal to copy money?
ABBOTT:   Microsoft gave us a license to copy Money.
COSTELLO:   They can give you a license to copy money?
(A few days later)
COSTELLO:   How do I turn my computer off?
ABBOTT:   Click on "Start."